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This section contains documents, rants, reviews, and anything else my fevered brain can come up with. 

My New Year's Resolutions01-04-09
My New Year's Resolutions - It's a brand new year with wonderful opportunities and potential, so here's a list of all the things I intend to put off until later.
I Had Some Weird Dreams11-21-08
I Had Some Weird Dreams - Not much going on right now, but I had some pretty strange dreams this week. Thought I'd share 'em with the class.
I Hate Crickets09-24-08
I Hate Crickets - They are noisy and totally gross.
Transformers the Game, the Review08-26-07
Transformers the Game, the Review -
Frosty reviews the recent Transformers game.
My Move To Richmond01-03-07
My Move To Richmond - With Commentary! - Frosty and I hold an intelligent, informed discussion about my move to Virginia and the ramifications it had on the environment. My first article in a little over a year!
Help Wanted12-03-06
Help Wanted - This is MaximumTacoLord's last article for Rail!... until I blackmail him again.
Taco, Slave of the Webmasters11-28-06
Taco, Slave of the Webmasters - The Internet is a series of tubes!
Man with PS3 Continues Playing Final Fantasy 1211-20-06
Man with PS3 Continues Playing Final Fantasy 12 - A message from MaximumTacoLord: "This is my 2 weeks notice, you making me stop playing ff12 jerk!"
JJ Wonders why Dinner Date hasnít Called Yet11-15-06
JJ Wonders why Dinner Date hasnít Called Yet - This article by MaximumTacoLord reminds me of my more youthful days. Ah, nostalgia... 
Scary Stuff11-05-06
Scary Stuff - At long last, we discover what MaximumTacoLord truly fears. 
I am More than a Strip Club!10-30-06
I am More than a Strip Club! - Halloween is around the corner, and MaximumTacoLord is sick of the strip club ads in the Onion. 
Gamer Wonders if Game was Worth 8 Controllers10-16-06
Gamer Wonders if Game was Worth 8 Controllers - We've all been there.
At Least Your Roommate isnít Zombie-Munching Crazy!10-10-06
At Least Your Roommate isnít Zombie-Munching Crazy! - "Zombies", "Explosions", "Laughter", "Death", and "Metal" are but a few of the many words you will find in this article.
United Nations Representatives Outraged by Poorly Planned Tekken Tournament10-07-06
United Nations Representatives Outraged by Poorly Planned Tekken Tournament - When diplomacy fails, United Nations representatives prepare their special attacks.
Michael or a Ninja?09-25-06
Michael or a Ninja? - The debate continues - MaximumTacoLord discusses this topic using a select combination of praises and insults.
How the Chicken Crossed the Road09-17-06
How the Chicken Crossed the Road - *SPOILER ALERT* - This article by MaximumTacoLord actually appears to be more about roads than chickens.
Psychology Teachers, Lowest of All the Grade Keepers09-11-06
Psychology Teachers, Lowest of All the Grade Keepers - I don't think MaximumTacoLord likes Psychology teachers very much.
In a Genre Filled with Crap, Prepare for More09-05-06
In a Genre Filled with Crap, Prepare for More - MaximumTacoLord discusses the repetitive, redundant nature of Halloween horror movie sequels.
Maniacal Laughter: Easy to Start, Hard to Maintain08-30-06
Maniacal Laughter: Easy to Start, Hard to Maintain - It ain't as simple as it looks, folks.
Aspiring Super Villain Considers Michael for a Nemesis08-26-06
Aspiring Super Villain Considers Michael for a Nemesis - Will evil triumph?
Rail To Consider More Ads08-07-06
Rail To Consider More Ads - While you're here, be sure to visit our sponsors!
Serial Killers Protest Negative Portrayal in Media07-31-06
Serial Killers Protest Negative Portrayal in Media - They're just misunderstood.
Barnes and Noble: Finally, Nerds Can Feel Alienated Even In A Bookstore07-24-06
Barnes and Noble: Finally, Nerds Can Feel Alienated Even In A Bookstore - MaximumTacoLord writes about nerds, libraries, bookstores, pesticides, and more.
RPGs Have Become the 5-907-17-06
RPGs Have Become the 5-9 - MaximumTacoLord discusses RPGs, moogles, and rabbit teeth in an enthusiastic and slightly zealous manner.
Hip-Hop, First Marketing Group to Target Fairies07-10-06
Hip-Hop, First Marketing Group to Target Fairies - Hip Hop Marketing takes over the forest!
Smokers Remain Blissfully Unaware of Latest Campus Anti-Smoking Campaign06-29-06
Smokers Remain Blissfully Unaware of Latest Campus Anti-Smoking Campaign - MaximumTacoLord wrote this article. Read it.
Local Bus Patron Annoyed By Singing Man06-20-06
Local Bus Patron Annoyed By Singing Man - According to MaximumTacoLord, this one is actually 100% true.
Zombies are Pigs06-12-06
Zombies are Pigs - A scathing, shocking commentary on workplace discrimination. MaximumTacoLord reports: Tonight at 11.
Elvis, Evil Robots and Beyond06-07-06
Elvis, Evil Robots and Beyond - MaximumTacoLord spins a mysterious, classic tale of betrayal, suspense, and murder! No, actually... I have no idea what this guy's talking about. 
Fans Outraged Favorite Starving Poet Used Book Sales to Buy Food. 05-29-06
Fans Outraged Favorite Starving Poet Used Book Sales to Buy Food - Here's another one from MaximumTacoLord.
Violence against Doppelgangers on the Rise05-21-06
Violence against Doppelgangers on the Rise - Our new guest writer, MaximumTacolord, tells us all we need to know.
A Package From My Past12-27-05
A Package From My Past
- I review a package my father sent me, filled with items from my teen years.
Music for the Holidays12-25-05
Music for the Holidays
- Frosty reviews a few holiday albums.
The Making of "I Like My Women Inbred - Special Edition"07-06-05
The Making of "I Like My Women Inbred - Special Edition"
- The title sums it up pretty well. I started writing this article in 2003. It's um, 2005 now.
How To Create "The Mood" Inexpensively And Easily01-08-05
How To Create "The Mood" Inexpensively And Easily
- Frosty writes about candles. Holy crap, does this one have a lot of photos.
The Hole In My Apartment01-03-05
The Hole In My Apartment
- Frosty tells us a heart-warming story about a boy and a his leaky ceiling.
More Old-School PC Games - With Downloads!12-08-04 
More Old-School PC Games - With Downloads!
- Bored? I bashed out a couple of sloppy game reviews.
More Old-School PC Games - With Downloads!12-07-04 
Review: Breaking Benjamin - "So Cold" EP
- Frosty reviews Breaking Benjamin's latest EP.
10 Reasons Why I Like the Winter11-14-04 
Ten Reasons Why I Like the Winter
- A quick top 10 list from Patrick, since I'm busy playing Halo 2!
The Laundry Article09-28-04 
The Laundry Article
- Frosty tells us all how to make the most of our laundry time!
The Dance Chick09-07-04 
The Dance Chick - A day in the life of Frosty - Copied and pasted from an MSN Messenger conversation.
Game Review: Doom 308-20-04 
Game Review: Doom 3
- I wrote a Doom 3 review because hey, everybody else is doing it!
Dating Tips and Advice from Your Uncle Frosty08-07-04 
Dating Tips and Advice from Your Uncle Frosty
- New Rail! writer Frosty gives us all much-needed grooming tips and dating advice!
Interview: Storm (From the black metal band Masshu)01-10-04
Interview: Storm (From the black metal band Masshu) - An interview with Masshu's malevolent frontman. With MP3 downloads and an extra-evil BLACK BACKGROUND!
Construction Workers Messed Up My Yard10-14-03
Construction Workers Messed Up My Yard - Let me explain. I originally just wanted to complain about a hole in my yard. PHOTOSHOP CONTEST INSIDE
Review: NOFX - The War on Errorism07-13-03
Review: NOFX - The War on Errorism
- NOFX's latest album is reviewed.
Things My Mother Brought Over06-05-03
Things My Mother Brought Over
- I review a few items my mom brought up from Florida.
Hey! Ho! Let's go!03-20-03
Review: A Tribute to The Ramones
- A review of the recent Ramones tribute album.
Shark!11-29-02
Game Review: Shark! Hunting the Great White - The scariest game ever, in my opinion.
Parking Lots11-07-02
Why Do They Do It? - Parking Lots - Guest writer Patrick rants about parking lots.
Heavy Metal Doodles and Sketches09-17-02
Heavy Metal Doodles and Sketches - A review of some sketches I made in High School in the early 1990's.
Journal: My Car Got Smacked In The Parking Lot By Some Asshole05-23-02
Journal: My Car Got Smacked In The Parking Lot By Some Asshole - The title pretty much explains it all.
Game Review: Super Duper Tic-Tac-Toe04-11-02
Game Review: Super Duper Tic-Tac-Toe - The new, improved version of the classic strategy game is reviewed for your edification.
How to get rid of telemarketers04-04-02
How To Get Rid Of Telemarketers - This article is based on an old PowerPoint presentation I wrote for school. I posted it to the site for grins. It's not necessarily funny, but it's over 1000 words, and I need as much content as I can get.
Egren Reunion. Vegas. 1998.03-17-02
Edgren Reunion. Vegas. 1998 - Drinking and smoking and bungee jumping and strippers and ELVIS!
Clash of the Titans Concert - 199101-24-02
Clash of the Titans Concert - 1991 - One of the greatest metal concerts of all time - and we weren't allowed to mosh!
My Favorite Old-School PC Games01-11-02
My Favorite Old-School PC Games - With Downloads! - I'm a nostalgic loser of a gamer. Here's a look back at the games that made me the screeching nerd I am today.
Top Ten Meals For Lazy Single Guys12-13-01
Top Ten Meals For Lazy Single Guys - Do you hate to cook? Don't like washing dishes? Read this article!
Read the review.10-29-01
Product Review: PhotoMAX FUN! FLASH 640 Digital Camera - Digital cameras are fun!
Save the rabbit!10-16-01
Profile: A Spill Absorber Rabbit! - Rabbits hate cleaning grease spills.
Crap From My Personal Home Page10-06-01
Crap From My Personal Home Page - One of Rail!'s first articles, based on news/log posts from my first home page. Reformatted and restored to the site on September 2, 2004.
Float like a butterfly - Sting like a bee.10-05-01
My Visit To Disney World
- A traumatic experience from my childhood.
Alan Jackson is evil.09-04-01
A Letter From PACM
- Also known as "Why We Should Ban Country Music"

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